Early this morning I had a lot of thoughts running through my head. Right after I woke up. Even before I jumped out of bed, a huge negative thought crossed my mind. And even though I can still feel it a few hours later, I don’t even know anymore what that thought was. I only remember the feeling attached to it.
My thoughts can lead to very sticky feelings lately. And yet, at some point they pass, just like my thoughts.
When sitting in the car a little later on the way to work, old songs from the 80s were being played on the radio. I started to sing along, forgetting about those negative thoughts and feelings. Forgetting about my body feeling super tired these last days. I was diving deep into the moment. Just enjoying the music and the landscape passing by.
And then as soon as I jumped out of the car strong negative thoughts appeared again. And I don’t know about you, but sometimes I think I really identify with those thoughts.
“Why do I identify with those thoughts?” I asked myself before I entered the café from where I am writing this down.
“Why? Because they make me feel a certain way and my body responds to them?”
That doesn’t make sense. My thoughts and feelings change all the time! Many, many times throughout a single day.
That part of me watching what’s happening has to be something else. And whatever it is, that means I am not my thoughts, I am not my feelings. I am expressing them at best, allowing them to happen, maybe repressing them sometimes as well.
And that means that I can have any thought. “I am brilliant” or “I am a real loser” – whatever it is. It doesn’t define who I am!
We are much more than our thoughts and our feelings. We are not limited by them. We are the gateway to express them.
And let me tell you, it’s much easier to express them, to allow them when you know that they are just passing through. Thoughts and feelings are here to be heard. By you.
So, whenever you can, give them the space they need, the attention they need.
I observe the more attention I give to my feelings and thoughts, the quicker I can “process” them. Especially negative feelings and thoughts have less interest to “stick around”, if I don’t push them away, but instead listen to them and see what they have to say. And very often they just want to be heard, nothing else. No negative consequences in the real world whatsoever.
You are so much more than your thoughts and feelings! So, next time you have a negative thought, don’t limit yourself to that thought. Don’t be upset that a repetitive thought like “I am ugly” is showing up. Instead, quiet for a moment, say “Hello” to that thought or feeling and listen to what it wants to share.